It’s another day.
Another day to pretend I’m alright.
Another day when I want to crawl inside
Myself and sleep
Forever, dreaming only of you
And the precious memories I keep
Locked silently unseen in my heart
Barred and chained from crashing out
In crushing waves every time I think of you
(which is all of the time).
It is a lock made of paper
That dissolves and dissolves again beneath my tears
Leaving memories spilling like a sugar rush
That sickens me, renders me helpless and paralysed with grief
Because I miss you with everything I am.
And I can’t tell you and I can’t tell them
How I really am.
That I’m not OK,
That tears don’t stop coming and I don’t know how to hold them back
If you aren’t there to catch my bowed head in your hands,
The bowed head resting only in my own hands,
The head I don’t know what to do with,
Now it has lost its heart.